Magic Depilatory Cream vs. Waxing: Which Method Wins the Battle for Smooth Skin?

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If you’re looking for inspiration for a new horror film, turning to folklore isn’t a bad idea, considering parents have been keeping their children in check with scary stories for generations. Producer James Wan thought it was a good idea, anyway, and the end result is this week’s The Curse of La Llorona, based on a well-known Mexican legend about the vengeful spirit of a scorned woman whose cries of anguish are said to bring misfortune to anyone who hears them. The film stars Linda Cardellini as a widowed mother and social worker who, skeptical of La Llorona’s existence, eventually finds herself and her children terrorized by the spirit and must work with a local faith healer (Raymond Cruz) to free herself from the curse. Unfortunately, critics weren’t particularly thrilled — or chilled — by the latest would-be entry in the Conjuring universe, calling into question the unsophisticated storytelling and director Michael Chaves‘ frequent and excessive use of jump scares. The character’s folk-tale origins certainly carry a lot of potential, but very little of it is realized in The Curse of La Llorona.

The latest in that vein is Penguins from Disneynature, which is billed as a coming-of-age story that follows a single male Adélie penguin in Antarctica as he sets out to find a mate and start a family of his own. Things start off poorly from the jump, with a confusing prologue allegedly set in 17th-century Mexico, which looks a hell of a lot like 19th-century Mexico.

The tragic curse of La Llorona

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The Curse of La Llorona review – supernatural sleepover fodder

There’s something scarily inconsequential about fright flick The Curse of La Llorona, a formulaic slab of supernatural dirge destined to be forgotten by year’s, or perhaps even month’s, end.

Not technically part of the blockbusting Conjuring franchise yet linked via an awkward, silly anecdote about evil doll Annabelle (who also cropped up in last month’s Shazam!), this 70s-set horror starts 300 years earlier with an ineffective introduction to the titular terror. La Llorona is a mother who drowns her two young children after finding her husband with a younger woman, and her story becomes an urban legend for future generations. Struggling widow Anna (Linda Cardellini) finds out the hard way that La Llorona is more than just a myth after the child-killing spirit attaches herself to her family with murder on her mind.

Seemingly designed to appeal to undemanding teens looking for a quick scare, The Curse of La Llorona contains little of interest for anyone else. Director Michael Chaves does a competent enough job of staging the film’s familiarly constructed set pieces but he fails to evoke enough of a creepy atmosphere, his haunting video for punk pop star Billie Eilish’s Bury a Friend proving far scarier. It’s all too easy to see the joins, to predict the machinations, to sigh rather than scream and as the plot ticks all of the expected boxes, it becomes nigh-on impossible to care what happens next.

While it’s nice to see Cardellini nab a rare lead (in the middle of an unusually fruitful time with turns in Green Book, Avengers: Endgame and Netflix comedy Dead to Me), the script fails to provide her with enough meat, despite her predicament, ultimately stranding her with a rather standard shrieking mother role. Everything about her character and the story within which she exists feels hopelessly unoriginal, something that could have been alleviated had the film delivered on any of its scares. But La Llorona is a duff villain and Chaves relies creakily on cheap musical lurches to get a rise out of his audience. Horror fans deserve better than this.

Curse doesn’t have much going for it beyond the ostensible distinctiveness of its Mexican mythos. Not lived-in period detail, certainly, of which there is little beyond Cardellini’s feathered hair and tin-foil TV dinners. Not the grounded specificity of its setting, given how shallowly the film regards its multicultural Southern California milieu. (Also: In what universe is it always raining in LA?) La Llorona herself is a ghost in the tragic gothic mold: Having murdered her own offspring in an appallingly misdirected act of retaliation against her adulterous husband, she wanders in search of “replacement” niños y niñas. Unfortunately, the Conjuring-verse – Curse included – tends to treat its specters, even the ones with vivid backstories, as little more than animatronic haunted-house props. They spring out at regular intervals, shriek horrifically, and toss objects and people around with their telekinetic powers, all without any discernible goal. It’s industrial scare-generation that’s entirely audience-directed, and although ancillary characters may show up to elucidate the motivations of the unquiet dead, as Tony Amendola’s priest does here, it never enriches the story. It’s just a cursory excuse for the same old tired theatrics.
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Reviews for "Magic Depilatory Cream: The Key to Effortless Hair Removal in Just Minutes"

1. Sarah - 1 star
I have never been more disappointed with a beauty product in my life. The Magic Depilatory Cream claims to remove hair quickly and painlessly, but it did neither of those things for me. First, the smell was absolutely horrible, like chemical waste. Next, the cream didn't remove all of my hair, leaving patchy spots all over my legs. Finally, it left my skin red and irritated, causing a burning sensation that lasted for hours. I will never use this product again and I strongly recommend others to stay away from it too.
2. John - 2 stars
I decided to try the Magic Depilatory Cream after reading some positive reviews online, but unfortunately, it didn't live up to the hype. The cream was messy and difficult to apply evenly. I followed the instructions carefully, but it did not remove all of my hair as it claimed. Moreover, it left a sticky residue on my skin that was hard to wash off. Overall, it was a disappointing experience and I would not purchase this product again.
3. Emily - 2 stars
I had high hopes for the Magic Depilatory Cream, but it failed to meet my expectations. First of all, the smell was extremely unpleasant, almost unbearable. Second, the cream did remove some hair, but it was far from effective. I had to go over the same areas multiple times, which was time-consuming and frustrating. Lastly, it left my skin feeling dry and irritated, even though it was supposed to have moisturizing properties. I was not impressed with this product and I wouldn't recommend it to others.

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