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Many of those times, I wore myself out with trying to be something I wasn’t simply because I wasn’t being honest with myself. I wasn’t honest about who I was or who I wanted to be. I was so focused on external opinions—What did Chris think about this? What would my mom think? Would my friends be impressed?
Emulating something you ve seen a fictional character do on television or someone else in real life do because you think you re not enough will always dilute your true purpose. But what s most important to us is that when we create, we do it in a way that when others see what we ve created or what we re a part of, they inevitably see God.
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How Influencer Mattie James Creates Everyday Magic
On a good day, Mattie James begins her morning at 5:00 am. The house is quiet, and she gets a few moments alone before her kids awake. Stevie Wonder’s “ Don’t You Worry ‘Bout a Thing” usually plays softly in the background. But as of late, Beyoncé’s “ Renaissance” album, in her words, has dragged her down a hill. To keep life simple, Mattie selects a dress from her closet, usually something with a print, because her enchanted uniform is both mood-boosting and a conversation starter.
This mother of three, wife, and influencer turned entrepreneur behind The Mattie James Company, and BOSSFLUENCE is busy, and the way things are going, she will only get busier. So, how does she do it all? Well, that’s all a part of her magic. To understand it, you must step into her world. Mattie’s new book “ Everyday Magic” wants to help you find joy in not being everything while still being more than enough.
The impelling force behind this book happened when Mattie hit a proverbial wall. “I had such an outdated idea of being a wife and mother. I equated being a wife and mother with being perfect. I was attached to that idea because we think we are lacking in some way and overcompensate,” Mattie shared.
View this post on Instagram“I created “Everyday Magic” because this is how I really live my life. Magic is something that I needed to hold onto as both my business and my family grew. This idea of being a superwoman was not sustainable, and it was not enjoyable. What is the point of having a life and not enjoying it? I know I did not want perfection; I wanted to understand what was most important to me.”
While in discovery mode, Mattie concluded no millennial women were leading the charge in this exploratory area. “When something is meaningful to me, that is what is important to me. If it is not meaningful, then it does not matter. Meaningfulness is so unique to us all. I wanted the framework for this book to be permissive and personalized. I want it to be relatable to everyone.” Magic as defined by Mattie, and the acronym for her framework, is not the panacea for life’s problems. It requires work to make each day: Meaningful – Aesthetically-pleasing – Goal-oriented – Intentional – and Consistent . One of her goals with this book is not to teach others how to do it all but to encourage them not to.
“For me, God is my everything. With me trying to be everything to everyone, that means I’m trying to play God, and the way he is already doing that and doing it well, there is no need for me to compete. Anytime we try to be everything to everyone, we are trying to be lowercase “god,” and we are not designed to do that. It is actually a misuse of God’s creation by trying to be everything. You miss out on what makes you, you, and what makes you actual magic. You end up spreading yourself too thin when you could just be the best version of yourself.”
Cultivating magic is not just something Mattie preaches but how she chooses to live. I can attest that this is true. I emailed her assistant to confirm a time to speak with her and received an autoresponder stating that The Mattie James Company is run by mothers and when follow-up would take place. I felt joy knowing a company set healthy boundaries for their employees and put humanity before productivity.
“You are allowed to have boundaries and be crazy successful at work. I want it to be clear that my personal and professional goals are aligned. And I want people to be okay with prioritizing themselves and their families. I am unapologetic about that,” said Mattie.
“It is important to me to protect my team. Any of us can do something well when we create safety. Boundaries are all about creating safety; this is why kids have crazy wild confidence because they know they have a safety net. Nothing makes you more confident than safety. I want my team to know that they are honored as parents. We really enforce our values here. We don’t just talk about it – we live it.” Empowering her team to live well is also a top priority for her. “I want to encourage women to take the mysticism out of living well. Living well is not exclusive to someone that is not you. You can live well. It’s not this pie-in-the-sky dream. You must define what living well means to you, and then you create the boundaries to do so.” The Mattie James Company brand partnerships include Amazon, Gerber, T.J.Maxx, and Clinique.”
Outside of the chapters, there are sections in the book that provide opportunities for reflection: Magic Memo , Magic but Real , and Magic Moment . Think of them as footnotes for clarity. Mattie makes it clear that this is not a book from a perfect person, understanding all too well how life can turn on its head. “The one thing I was really candid about in the book was the fact that my husband Christopher and I were separated in 2016 and what that looked like for me. And what I had to look into as a person.”
“Outside of those sections, I try to make it very clear that every single one of us is complete and that you lack nothing. Without my husband, my kids, and my 7-figure business, I am complete,” she added.
Mattie and Christopher were able to reconcile their relationship and grow from it. She dedicated “ Everyday Magic” to him.
“One of the most magic things about my relationship is that we like each other. That is my friend. My baby daddy. He’s just awesome. He is so kind and thoughtful, and that means a lot to me. I love the kids getting to see two Black people in love. Both sets of our parents have been married 42 years, and I don’t take that lightly. I hope it gives my kids permission to create a household of joy and have a partner you really enjoy,” said Mattie.
Twenty-four hours is a lot of time to be away from your family, especially if you don’t have family or friends nearby to hold down your home base as you take time for yourself. If your schedule won’t allow you to have a literal day to yourself, take a few hours. Take a personal day or use your day off to intentionally relax while your kids are at school or the baby is with a loved one. This “you day” could end up being six to eight hours (rather than a full twenty-four hours), but because your time was intentionally uninterrupted and reserved for you to recenter and relax, it still serves its purpose. Put your phone on “Do Not Disturb,” delete social media to prevent scrolling, let your village know that you’ll be unavailable unless it’s an emergency, and do whatever recharges you. Give yourself permission to do so. Be encouraged to take a “you day” at least once a month or quarter (depending on your schedule).
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Reviews for "L'Oreal Paris Magic Perfecting Base Face Primer: The Secret to Minimizing Fine Lines and Wrinkles"
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